WOULD YOU LIKE TO STOP SUFFERING?

Nancy’s Non-Fiction Book Ratings
•    Gripped from first page, an absolute must read
•    Not exactly a page turner but interesting enough to read cover to cover
•    Moderately informative, but dry and academic, so I skimmed for salient points
•    Left on my nightstand forever but never reached for it like I don’t want to reach for the Manolo Blahnik boots that hurt. Boring, academic writing/dry as a bone

Why do we beat up on ourselves when we’re already suffering? How do women deal with trauma? Buddhist teacher Dr. Christopher K. Germer teaches that, “Mindful self-compassion is the foundation of emotional healing.”

That’s so weird! Love yourself? How selfish! But Dr. Germer says that cultivating compassion toward yourself allows you to feel compassion for others. So loving yourself is a win-win. You learn to love yourself despite your history and you also begin to love others.

Dr. Germer teaches Buddhist Metta meditation. In a nutshell, Metta is a form of Buddhist meditation that focuses on self-compassion. This form of meditation was developed by the Buddha himself as an antidote to fear.

The word Metta is an ancient Pali word. (Pali is the Sri Lankan language in which the Buddha’s teachings were written down 400 years after his death.) Metta is translated loosely to mean loving-kindness, self-compassion, goodwill, love, sympathy.

The objective of Metta mediation is to learn self-compassion, to be free from pain and suffering. Metta is learning to love yourself without the encumbrances of attachment (clinging, wishing, longing for material things and/or emotional attachments). In Metta practice you can also give love/compassion to others, to people you know, to your pets, and to strangers (all living beings).

Other forms of meditation may use a mantra or require that you try to stay with your breath. In Metta meditation the practitioner repeats four phrases over and over.

May I be safe

May I be happy

May I be healthy

May I live my life with ease

These phrases gently transform the way you think and feel and slowly but surely you begin to see that you are not reacting in ugly knee jerk ways. You are calmer in daily life, more accepting, happier.

Metta practice can free your distraught, angry, tense, uptight, anxious mind, self-hating, suffering mind so that you can experience love, peace and happiness in a natural flow from your calmed down mind. Neurological studies have demonstrated that Metta (compassion) meditation actually changes activity in the brain that deals with emotion.

You can listen to Dr. Germer on The Martha Trowbridge Radio Hour: Empathic Wisdom for Suffering Women. In this radio interview, which is directed to women who are depressed, traumatized, and grief stricken. Dr. Germer leads listeners through a five minute Metta Soften Allow and Love practice, and a traditional ten minute Metta practice so that you can get a very good idea of what Metta is all about—what self compassion mean (to be happy and free from suffering!)

I’d also like to direct you to Dr. Germer’s website.

I have read many books on Buddhism, but it wasn’t until I read Dr. Germer’s book that I felt I had a grasp of how to meditate. (Some people may feel that hard-core Zen meditation is the only way, but for women like me who are really just looking for some peace and quiet in a gentle way, Metta is the way!)

The Mindful Path to Self Compassion: Freeing Yourself from Destructive Thoughts and Emotion explains the psychological benefits of mindfulness and self-compassion. Dr. Germer writes about fascinating case histories and simple enjoyable exercises of Metta meditation to help you learn the practice.

Nancy’s Book Rating: Gripped from first page, an absolute must read.